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The 1.75 Millionth Anniversary of the Collar

ON this day , January 31, 1.75 million years ago, Uh was standing on a stone outcrop overlooking what would later become the city of Newark, New Jersey. A chill passed through him.

A prehistoric swamp rat the size of two dachshunds tied together end-to-end ambled by. Uh pierced the beast with his special pointy stick (arf!), skinned it in one quick squeak, quickly made some string from its intestines, and sewed the fur to the neckline of his opossum-skin shirt. Cozy, thought Uh.

Uh made his way back to the cave. There, the people looked at his fancy new clothing accessory, and said, “Uh?”

And Uh was pleased.

That’s the story of the invention of the collar. Since that time the collar has gone through a lot of changes, and we thought it would be a good day to celebrate some of those change. Well, actually, that’s a lie. We just wanted what passed for a good reason to show you this picture, and we couldn’t think of one. So here you go: